The Million Coins Cheat

The Million Coins cheat has been a very special Satanic ritual in Club Erectile Dysfunction since the game's early years. It was first developed by Gary Busey in 2008 when he decided to join a hacking group called lolsecurity in order to destroy every possible aspect of Club Penguin for ruining his sexual fantasies of penguins. Despite the fact that the cheat is still around today, the creators of the game never fixed it because the developers are a bunch of stupid, smelly fat-asses who fail to maintain the shitty game, much less, their social lives.

Activation
Though the cheat seems very rewarding, the tasks required to activate it are very malicious and probably more harmful than helpful to some. To begin, one must remove both of their ring fingers and place them in the middle of an adequately made pentagram drawn with bath salts and with the head of a family member at each point. Then you must mix an entire box of baking soda, waffles, your left foot, and gasoline into a bowl, microwave it for approximately 666 seconds, and cram the bowl as well as it's contents into your anal cavity while singing a series of Polish Christmas songs backwards at the top of your lungs for all to hear. Only then will Gary Busey appear to remove the bowl and devour it, himself.

Reward
Though the cheat sounds very rewarding as one million coins sounds like a lot, the currency in club penguin is by far the most useless form of currency in the history of currency, itself, and only equals about a millionth of a penny in US currency. Even the cheapest of items within the game, like mousetraps, thimbles, and simple hats are worth at least 50 million coins because the developers of the game put the children in charge of the stock market, which caused it to plunder faster than any other reported economic downfall with a record of 2.6 seconds.